Eh, I really am a bastard...

::sighs:: I should be doing my Grimmjow post, but I don't feel like it. My stomach hurts cus I'm kinda hungry, but all I have is Cheez-Its upstairs so fail. And I can barely eat anyway. It's like my stomach shrank down to nothing and I eat less than half of what I used to and get full. I ate a cup of RAMEN and felt........ full.... That's sad. I know I don't get out and exercise so I don't need to eat a lot, but one cup of noodles? ::sighs:: No wonder I'm losing weight... though I think that scale was lying when it said I was 156...

::purses lips:: And Asahu is mad at me, cus I wouldn't call him. I think me not wanting to call him [so he could hear my voice] made him think I don't realize the significance of our relationship. He said 'THE POINT IS YOU THINK I THINK NOTHING OF YOU', but that isn't true. I just dislike having to explain it which is ironic cus I'll explain it here and not to him.

He tells me a lot of stuff, and he asks for my opinions a lot, and I think he values my responses. I call him a retard a lot though, cus he fails at women because women are really, really, retarded and scarily two-faced. I appreciate this, and keep it all in confidence, and laugh and joke with him a lot. He trusts me, but I can't say that I trust him. In fact, I can't say I trust anyone fully. There are things I don't tell anyone, don't burden others with, and that's just how I am. I'm one of those openly private people. An extroverted introvert. Whichever, and can be happy and outgoing, but there are things I'll never tell anyone, won't write down, and just think about them a little then go on about my life. I see no point in dwelling in the past, but I do quite a bit, and I hate it. So I just try to live in the present or look forward.

There's no point in looking behind you when you have so many things ahead of you. You'll probably just run into something anyway.

Drabble #24

There were a lot of ‘social events’ that CEOs, bosses, and community leaders seemed destined to attend, no matter how great the workload each individual had backlogged. Renee dragged herself to each of these meetings, noted who declined to come, all those who approached her because very few were honestly just being friendly, and who was talking to who.

One of the more interesting people that dined to talk to her was Marco Ballantyne. She had seen him around, smooth talking the women, easily conversing with the men, and being exceptionally courteous to the staff. The more she saw him, the more she tried to keep their contact to a minimum. He didn’t make her nervous or even give her any shady feelings. It just seemed impossible that such a nice guy lead the 5th most profitable organization in the country.

Marco’s reign began at the end of a bloody conflict that resulted in more than half of PS’s [Percorso di Salvezza ] directorial and supervisory board being slaughtered in their homes, in the streets, and even in highly publicized car explosions. All of his rivals were either missing or suddenly staunch supporters of his leadership with their families having been relocated close to the central building. His methods were utterly ruthless and methodical, but it was all hidden behind a salesman’s smile.

When he glided over to Renee –because he didn’t appear to walk like normal people, chocolate brown hair swept back and looking immaculate as always, she was instantly wary. He had on a slightly twisted smile that seemed at odds with how he ordinarily tried to portray himself. If he noticed this, he didn’t try to correct it. In fact, he didn’t say anything to her outside of the cordial ‘Hello, Ms. Sharps. How have you been?’ until after his second glass of wine.

It was then that the verbal dance began.